I ate too much today.
As a result, this baby bump feels twice as big.
I went to a baby shower for a friend today…and ate a shit ton of little pinwheel things. And cake. And I had three mocktails. Then I came home and Mikel made sage sausage gravy and biscuits…one of my favorites. I ate the shit out of that. Then we went to Lowe’s and suddenly I wanted ice cream. So I ate 2/3 of a pint of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. And I drank the hell out of some apple juice, too.
Overall, I’m feeling fantastic. So fantastic that I keep waiting for the crappy stuff to kick in. As soon as I got pregnant, that’s mostly what people told me about. “Oh, you’re gonna be feeling awful soon.” “Morning sickness is around the corner, get ready!” “Heartburn and back aches are going to make you miserable!” “Your skin is going to freak out and your boobs will go to shit.”
I haven’t really experienced any of that. Or any of the other million things I’ve been warned about by books, pregnancy apps, the doctors, experienced mothers or random strangers. While that makes me feel like a super hero and I’m incredibly grateful to have gotten this far (28 weeks) with no issues, I’m still expecting some hell to break loose any day now.
I’m not in love with my boobs these days. They weren’t exactly small to begin with, so by this point they are comically large. I feel like Beth from Dog the Bounty Hunter. I gotta keep these thangs under tight wraps in order to not feel like I’m offending the general population. Plus I don’t want them getting in my way…or any one else’s.
My feet have grown half a size. Which doesn’t really bother me. I’m a size 9 now…so whatever. I still have ankles at this point, so swelling hasn’t become an issue.
My skin is clearer than it’s been in forever and ever and ever. I’m actually worried about what it’s gonna do once I have the baby. Is my face gonna become one giant zit?
I don’t care for maternity clothes. You remember when your mom would buy you clothes when you were like, 13 years old? They were technically your size, but you were all awkward and unsure of what your style really was, but whatever she’d gotten you most definitely was NOT it. So you’d put on the jeans or khakis she’d picked out and they felt horrible. They were tight in weird places while managing to be loose in all the worst places. They came up super high and if you were a girl, they gave you a polterwang (when the excess fabric in the crotch of your pants folds in such a way as to look like you’re packing some serious heat. You have a ghost wiener. A polterwang.)
THAT’S WHAT MATERNITY CLOTHES FEEL LIKE. They feel super awkward and they fit strangely and I feel like everybody is looking at how uncomfortable I look. So I’ve opted to stick with my usual clothes…just in bigger sizes. And leggings are a huge must. Jeans, under wire bras, pants of any kind? All those are basically dead to me.
So while I’m feeling fantastic and all that good, wonderful stuff, I’m tweaking my baby registry every few days. I’m booked solid at work, making bank to squirrel away for maternity leave. I’m sleeping in every chance I get. I’m trying to get rid of clutter (which Mikel is fighting me on constantly.) And I’m trying to get things handled that need handling.
This belly is starting to interfere with simple tasks. I’m loving it, though. Each day I feel a little bit bigger and I feel the baby tap dancing around in there. Things are becoming more and more real the bigger I get.
Ok, I’m gonna go look at baby stuff online now.